WORKING ON A DREAM: A FINNISH WOMAN TEACHING CHINESE IN CHINA

Lydia Nordlien left her home five years ago and moved to China with an ambitious goal: to become a Chinese teacher. Her determination led her to unbelievable results.

When Lydia moved from Norway to Suzhou with her family - husband and two daughters - like many others expat wives, she quit her job. She was a Secondary School teacher in Mathematics and loved her students and teaching.

“When I was a child in Finland, I was bored at school, and slept a lot in class or skipped them. Eventually, after moving to Norway age 18, I figured I wanted to be a teacher to teach less boringly.”

Her husband came home from work one day, and she saw that light in his eyes. He had been offered a position in China he really wanted. 

“I knew that whatever he would say, I would agree to. At that time I was in trouble with my new principal, so my husband didn't even get to finish what he was saying before I told him I'm ready.”

The year before moving, she started studying Chinese at an evening school. She soon found out hardly any Chinese teachers in Norway spoke much English or Norwegian. The Chinese lady, a former Secondary Teacher from Shanghai, could only show them pictures and play children's songs for them. Lydia quit and found no better options either.

“After preparing all practical issues and our children for the move, I realized I hadn't made a plan for what I would do in China. The solution came seconds later – I would study Chinese and become a Chinese teacher.”

Once arrived in China, Lydia signed up at the local university. She studied there for three years and spent up to 70 hours a week on the studies. 

“The clash between Chinese education methods and everything I knew about teaching was total. I was in agony, angry, depressed and eventually desperate because the teachers didn`t teach, but mostly told us what to memorize. I had to start teaching myself and invent ways of understanding. I tailored study methods to motivate myself. I also managed to track down an excellent private teacher who could keep up with my intensive studies. She was my light in the dark, and became one of my best friends later.”

After finishing her studies, which included studying up to HSK 6 and HSKK Advanced (highest level of Chinese proficiency exams), she tried to find work, but no one would even consider a foreigner teaching Chinese. She didn’t give up and, and building on the methods she used for her own studies, she put together a system for learning Hanzi, Chinese characters.

“Over the years countless parents and students had complained how hard it is to learn the Chinese characters by only memorizing. I went straight to one of the most influential women in our community and showed her how to learn and remember easier. She was convinced and helped me offer lessons for groups of parents. I also wrote a self-ironical book in Norwegian about my crash landing in the Chinese education system. Eventually, I offered lessons to university students and others, and gained attention.”

However, the path was not easy. Lydia contacted some Chinese Language schools, but after examining all her materials they rejected her. She was also not allowed to volunteer or assist in Chinese classes at an International school, even though she was fully qualified to work as a Substitute teacher at the same school. Lydia nearly lost her faith in the project. She fell back on giving English lessons but wasn’t satisfied.

“One day a friend of mine asked me: Is teaching English what you really want to do? The answer was no. So she pushed me to pursue my dream, and I started up again. I was introduced to a bar where I taught groups and my “Hack Hanzi with Lydia” got a lot of people interested. At this point, the President of the Suzhou branch of the governments International Chinese Language Teachers Association contacted me. She asked me to teach some of the members she was in charge of. I taught Chinese Chinese teachers in Chinese how to teach Chinese characters. That was a «pinch my arm» - moment. What`s more, they liked the class so much I was asked for more.”

She didn’t give up on the first “no,” she worked until she reached a “yes”! This is why she succeeded.

“As to why I did all this might be because I am a nerd, through and through, and just have to challenge myself. I have this life, and I want to look back and know I've lived it, carved out my space and made a difference. The more I learn, the more there is to learn. I'm never better than my next class.”

If you want to attend her classes, just write her on WeChat! Lydia is also InterNations Suzhou Ambassador, and you can get in touch with her on www.internations.org.

WHY DO I LOVE EXPATS?

My expat adventure began almost 5 years ago when I moved from the lethargic Italian suburbs to the dynamic, noisy and chaotic Chinese city which became our second home. 

I had never lived abroad before, but I had the chance to know some expats and I was always intrigued by their stories, fascinated by their open-minded attitudes. I was an avid reader of expat stories and every time, I felt like my life in the slow, peaceful Italian countryside fit me snugly.

Finally, I became an expat myself and made many friends among people who lived abroad. I really do love expats (I even wrote a novel about them!). They face life in a different way. How exactly? Why are they different? Let me explain my point of view:

1) They make friends easily:

Leaving behind your family, your friends and the place where you were born can make you feel lonely. Expats know they have to make friends quickly in order to survive: they must find a tribe, a kind of family substitute to rely on. This is why they usually aren’t shy: they know how to break the ice, they become experts in the art of small talks, they tend to be less leery and more open.

2) They learn how to face problems courageously: 

When you live abroad, in a country where people speak another language, have different habits, sometimes also think in a different way, even the smallest thing can be scary. Daily life’s trivia as going to the hairdresser, talking with you kids’ teachers, opening a bank account may be scattered with obstacles and you need a jolt of courage to accomplish them. This is why expats are usually very brave people: they learn to do things even when they don’t feel at ease doing them. They know how to step out of their comfort zone - actually they live outside it almost every day!

3) They always know how to figure it out:

Moving in another country is not a simple matter: you have to complete procedures, get visas, contact relocation companies, enroll children in a new school, find a house that suits you. Most of the times you must do these things remotely, relying only on the internet - and your instinct! This is why expats usually can handle themselves in many different situations without getting lost along the way.

4) They always complain about something, but at the same time, they learn to respect other cultures:

They complain? Yes, they do! About food, about traffic, about certain attitude of locals, about weather, about… whatever! But at the same time, they learn to understand other cultures, they develop what experts call “cultural intelligence” and are able to relate with people from all over the world. 

5) They are direct and less formal: 

When it comes to writing an email, I’m always surprised how easy it is to communicate with expats. In Italy, for instance, when we write letters we really like to address people with their qualification and use polite set phrases to sound kind and respectful. But when you write in English… it’s all so simple! You start your letter with “Hi!” and that’s all!

6) They are creative:

Living abroad forces you to reinvent many aspects of your life. If you are the spouse, you probably need to create a new, portable career. This is why many expats devote themselves to their passions: they become painters, writers, bloggers. They create jewels, dresses, gadgets. If they come up with a new idea, they’ll probably be successful.

And you? Do you also think expats are peculiar people? Let me know in the comments!

PARSLEY & CORIANDER: THE BOOK IS OUT!

Today is the big day. After months of hard work, the English edition of my novel "Parsley & Coriander" is finally out!

But why should you be interested in my novel? Who are the protagonists? What is the point?

There are so many books about expat life, accompanying spouses, experiences abroad: why should you bother to read another one?

Reading and enjoying a book is a very personal experience, I know. I can’t promise that you will adore “Parsley & coriander”: you might stay awake all night to devour it, or read a few pages, put it on your night table and never open it again. 

What I can do, instead, is to introduce you to some of the characters, let them show you something more, let them make you feel the atmosphere, take your hand and captivate you.

So, characters of my book, who wants to talk first?

“Hi there! I’m Luisella!”

I knew you would have spoken first! What can you tell us about yourself?

“I’m a friendly, lively person. If I were to meet you in the street, and realize that you are a newly arrived expat in China, I would probably invite you for a coffee and make you feel at ease. This is who I am: I can’t help myself helping others - my husband always says I should mind my own business! I love China, I really do. At first, it wasn’t easy, but I learned to adapt to such an extent that I don’t want to leave anymore!”

Beautiful lady, your name is Emma, right? Would you like to tell us something about your story?

“What can I say? I wasn’t supposed to become an expat! My husband got a one-year contract only, and we planned I would stay in Italy. But… our marriage was falling apart and I decided to follow him. What happened next…. I would have never expected it! It was something I didn’t look for and that totally changed my life, or maybe I should say ‘someone’…”

Please, don’t reveal too much! I know you are a very passionate and romantic woman but, you know, if you let them know everything, they won’t buy the book!

And you, over there in the corner? Would you like to say something to your potential readers?

“Oh… uhm… that’s Astrid! I’m not good at talking… what should I say? I’m a mom of two, a wife, occasionally I remember I’m a person, as well. I’m trying to perk myself up after going through a difficult period. China? Oh, it’s very different from my expectations! My feelings? I’m always afraid of something… I don’t know why! I really hate myself for this! But I’m working on it, you know? I’m sure this experience abroad will help me change!”

I usually don’t like to speak about absent people, but can you briefly introduce some of your fellow characters? Is there anyone in particular you like/dislike?

L: “My best friend in the book is Dora. I love her! She’s bursting with energy, beautiful, passionate! I was desperate when she told me she wanted to leave China. But luckily something happened…”

A: “Camilla is maybe the most particular girl I bumped into. At the beginning I thought she was a weirdo, all obsessed about wanting to blend in with the Chinese world, but after a while, I actually got along with her, and she became a good friend…”

E: “Oh, my! Not Camilla, please! It really didn’t work between us!”

A: “So, you prefer Silvia, that snobby woman?”

Ok girls, that’s enough, thank you! I will let the readers discover it by themselves!

Actually, I have one last question: if I ask you to say one sentence, only one, which can give a hint to the readers of what happens to you in the story, what would you say?

L: “Find a role in life and fight for it.”

E: “Follow your heart, even if it may seem crazy!”

A: “Be strong and don’t be afraid of changes.”

So, thank you for…

“Excuse me, may I say something?”

Yes, please. What’s your name?

“I’m Genny. I’m not a main character in the book, but I think many ladies can relate to my story. I lived in China for a short time, I never really fit in and, I confess, I couldn’t wait to go back to Italy. But when I finally repatriated, unexpectedly, I missed my life in China. If any of you experienced this once you returned to your home country, you know perfectly well what I mean. So if you ever lived in China, this book will bring back the atmosphere of those days. It’s worth reading!”

Thanks for your opinion, Genny. And thank you all, my characters, for coming alive once more. I really loved spending time with you as I wrote the story, you will always have a special place in my heart!

Ah, of course, you can find it on Amazon!

CHALLENGE OF THE FIRST DAYS

Just arrived, I realized that my first priority was to making friends: my husband would begin to travel soon and I would be alone with children in a foreign city. I had to be prepared to any emergency. I had to feel safe and secure. If you have friends around you, this can help a lot to make you feel at ease.

Actually, I'm not so social! But I forced myself to be.

The first person who spoke to me was a friendly, young Korean lady. She saw me outside the compound shop (I think I looked really as “just arrived”!) and she simply said “Hello!”. I felt really shy and not confident in my English skills, but I tried not to make me pull down by my fears. And we are still friends now!

Another point in my favor was that I already contacted people before coming in China, and so when I arrived, I already had their telephone number!

The first Sunday I received a text message from an Italian blogger lady living in Suzhou “We are sitting in the playground near your building. Would you like to join us?”

When we rush to the playground we found a cheerful group of Italians chatting and laughing together. We were introduced and this was the beginning of the story... then it has been easy to take part to lunch and trips around Suzhou (and Suzhou shops, eheh!) and I quickly built my network!

School and playground have been the right places to find friendly moms, also! The wonderful opportunity to expand my group of friends even among foreigners.

If you don't have children (and you miss the possibility that schools and playgrounds can give) you can join a gym, a language course or an expat-group.

Usually (not always, but this is another story) expats are very open to meet new friends and is very easy start talking with someone. They are also very helpful with each other. Don't miss the chance!

WHO ARE WE? WHAT DO WE DO? WHERE ARE WE GOING?

The answer to the first question is easy: we are an Italian family, relocated in China since August 2012. Daddy (often traveling around Asia), Mommy (it's me! The one who loves writing) and two little pests aged 5 (girl) and 3 (boy).

When, one year ago, the opportunity to work and live in China happened to us, we didn't think a lot before saying YES! Italy isn't a good place to find a job, nowadays. And something called crisis is getting people down. So we thought “It could be good to escape for a while from this bad atmosphere”. It couldn't have been more true! My husband's career is going well, children are happy in their new environment and the little girl can speak English and a bit of Chinese already!

And me? Despite of the statistics about depression and difficulties of accompanying partners, I discovered a new myself: more self-confident, more enthusiastic, more open to other people!

I'm lucky because I have passions: I like writing, drawing and painting. I left behind my accountant career without looking back (actually I never liked so much that job!). Now I'm not forced to work and I can try to do only what I like: perhaps a new career is waiting for me behind the corner!

So I've already answered to the second question!

And how about the third one? Where are we going? For the moment we wish to stay in China for some years, trying to take all the best from this experience!